Monthly Archives: May 2014

Family

I think I have on this once before in the post PTSD.  I believe it important to circle back to this point as it is often missed by members of family of future and current cult members.

I was twelve years old when we were courted by Kim’s group. My father was the only one who spoke up when we presented the idea of moving into the cult.  Because it was a decision I was in support of I did cover up to some extent the reality of it to my father.  All of this is subconscious and as a cult member you are not aware of the guarding.

My grandparents were brought into the fold by my father, and their apathy ended up being perceived as support by my mother.  This put the nail in the proverbial coffin for us moving in.  

My point is this, do not sit idly by while your relationship with your family member slips away.  Life is only so long, and losing them to a cult is a reality and not overstatement. Any kind of intervention would have prevented this.  My dad did his best effort with me and leveraged who he could… Unfortunately those he leveraged didn’t step up in the same way.

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Other’s experiences

http://www.treelight.com/essays/magical_moments.html#pageToc44

Eric, who was a member of COL and Jung SuWon has published his own take on the experience.  His life, a little different than mine has left him down a bit of a meandering path, during which he has appeared to look fondly upon negative and positive experiences.  His experiences are certainly worth a read.

One of the highlights was an interaction in which he noted an interest from a female member of the group and was subsequently subjected to suspension in the group, which lead to a period of homelessness.

Worth a read, and credit to Eric for opening up about his experiences.

Anniversaries

Second: This blog is now two years old.

I wish I had to post more, but I just don’t.  My children are older, my time is more valuable spent doing other things, also I travel a lot more for work, which just eats up your time in so many inexplicable ways.  This blog is cathartic, but in the end hopefully by book will get it’s act together and everyone can read that.

Ninth: The original thread on Bullshido was started by me in 2005

This was the most important thing I have done to help people survive COL.  It opened up a forum for the first time.  It took a couple of years to really get going, but I knew it was important the day I posted that thread. I think it has helped many, me included move on and continue the healing process of living in Tae Yun Kim’s dangerous cult.

Tenth: The original post I made on e-budo was ten years ago this summer.  

This was mostly unsuccessful; As well I received loose threats which were relayed by my mother from people still on the inside, that they’d come after me…  Luckily I found friends later in the free-for-all that is Bullshido.

Eleventh: Eleven years since my mother successfully left COL.

March 27, 2003 was her second attempt… Her first was in late 2002.  She was out once and for all once she left this time.  

Fifteenth: My anniversary of officially leaving COL passed in February.

It may have been fifteen years, but this is still one of the most memorable experiences, for better or worse, of my life time. A cult will affect you forever and make you who you are.  We can’t avoid who we become due to experiences, but we can do our best moving on and forward with our lives.

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